Sunday, September 9, 2007

A Look into the Crystal Ball for the November 30th ROC Finals

Friday's Ring of Combat 15 event marked the opening round of the "Beasts of the Northeast" tournament - the only three-round Grand Prix-style MMA tournament in the US - and it proved to be a night of excitement, thrills, and tons of trauma-induced medical suspensions. As MMA Journalist is the proud owner of a crystal ball (hey, a distant great-great-uncle on my mom's side was a gypsy), a glimpse into the future reveals this about the November 30th finals: -In the lightweight division, events are cloudy. But it appears submission stud Brian McLaughlin and the ultra-talented and dangerous Eddie Fyvie will wage war. Due to massive collateral damage to the Atlantic City area, New Jersey Governor John Corzine will request federal aid for disaster relief and the rebuilding efforts.
-In the welterweight division, tough Jungle Gym fighter Joseph Aviles will win the 170-pound belt due to being the most "street". This is established after he shanks his opponent in the semi-finals.
-The future is uncertain in the middleweight division due to the high skill level of the remaining four competitors, but the crystal ball favors ROC Champ Marc Stevens and his ability to go from calm and friendly dude to the "Incredible Hulk" in the span of two seconds. Stevens is quoted as saying "Marc smash!" during each of his bouts.
-John Doyle will win the light-heavyweight title by eating his opponents' souls in the semi-finals and finals - just like he did at the opening round on Friday night. Tune in for more glimpses of the future courtesy of the MMA Journalist crystal ball.