Thursday, January 20, 2011

Predictions for UFC "Fight for the Troops 2"

Saturday night will bring us the second installment of the UFC’s “Fight for the Troops” series, which is an event staged on a military base before a few thousand screaming and cheering troops, all for the benefit of the Intrepid Fallen Heroes Fund.  It promises to be an exciting night - and if the first Fight for the Troops show is any indication, it should be one heck of a dose of carnage.  At the infamous December, 2008, outing, Corey Hill snapped his leg completely and utterly in half, Razak Al-Hassan had his arm broken, Jonathan Goulet was decapitated, and headliner Yoshiyuki Yoshida suffered so much head trauma, for the following four months he thought he was Pikachu.  In short, it was “300”-level madness.  So what’s in store for viewers who tune into SpikeTV?  Predictions!

  • Cody McKenzie vs. Yves Edwards – McKenzie will make history in this one, as he’ll become the first fighter to ever lose by appendicitis.
  • Joey Beltran vs. Pat Barry – Another heretofore unseen outcome will be Barry’s loss by the medical condition known as “potato famine”.
  • Mark Hominick vs. George Roop – Though a skilled competitor and a striking-threat to champ Jose Aldo, Hominick will blow his shot when he goes for double-flying-knees and breaks both shins.  And hands.  And nose.  And sprains his hair.
  • Matt Mitrione vs. Tim Hague – Mitrione’s recurring fractured skull injury will rear its ugly head, although the only manifestation exhibited will be mental illness.  He will become the first (and hopefully only) fighter to lose by “TKO due to schizophrenia”.
  • Evan Dunham vs. Melvin Guillard – Dunham will snag the “W” when Guillard suddenly has an allergic reaction to his own hair dye and suffers a seizure.
  • Mike Brown vs. Rani Yahya – Yahya is going to explode.  Literally.  And for no medical reason whatsoever.