Wednesday, October 7, 2009

CBS To Promote November 7th Strikeforce Show With Telepathy, Astral Projection

In lieu of commercials, print ads and other commonly used methods of marketing, CBS has to decided to promote their November 7th Strikeforce event via telepathic means, according to an astrally projected press release circulated today. The event, which will feature heavyweight top dog Fedor Emelianenko versus Brett Rogers on live television, has thus far had zero promotional support from the Tiffany Network - much to the chagrin of MMA fans and observers alike. But today's astrally projected release seems to go a long way towards allaying any fears that CBS isn't completely behind the event or that they're setting Strikeforce up to fail. "We at CBS are firmly committed to giving this momentous fight show the push it deserves," said a network spokesperson who appeared in the dreams of dozens of sports writers. "In the coming weeks, a legion of telepaths will be broadcasting their positive Fedor Emelianenko thoughts to the world, and come November 7th, just about anyone with a TV set will have the uncontrollable urge to tune in." Though it's unclear how effective this method of advertising is, it's comforting to know CBS is at least doing something.