Friday, October 24, 2008

Things That Won't Happen at UFC 90

UFC 90 on Saturday night! Anderson Silva committing another legal murder! Wahoo! Here's a list of things that won't happen at this Rosemont, Illinois event:
  • Patrick Cote is not going to emerge from his bout with Silva unscathed. In fact, he's going to be scathed. Very, very scathed.
  • Josh Koscheck is not going to reveal his ethnicity in his victory speech.
  • Sean Sherk and Tyson Griffin are not going to employ any wrestling in their lightweight battle. Psych!
  • Matt Horwich is not going to invoke Satan is his pre-fight warm-up.
  • The corner men of Hermes Franca and Marcus Aurelio will not shout any instructions in Portuguese. Psych!

A Review of MTV's True Life: "I am a Mixed Martial Arts Fighter"

Last night MTV's True Life documentary series featured an episode called "I am a Mixed Martial Arts Fighter", which had an amateur from Colorado named Ian Stone fighting in a local event, Muay Thai champ Kit Cope fighting in Atlantic City against some scrub, and UFC lightweight star Frankie Edgar taking on Gray Maynard. Some thoughts:
  • Stone is a good example of what's wrong with MMA kids today. I mean, he cooked that lone egg he was eating for dinner. Rocky Balboa would've eaten it raw.
  • It was good to see Cope and girlfriend Aubrey together again after she'd stood by his side on that True Life: "I am a Muay Thai Fighter" from a few years ago. The sport needs more interpersonal drama like that. Maybe they can hang out with that couple from True Life: "I am an Douchebag from Staten Island".
  • The producers did an excellent job of showing that the venue was almost completely empty for Cope's fight at the World Fighting Championship in Atlantic City. They should have at least added in spectators via CGI, right?
  • Edgar conducted an interview over the phone while driving. Whenever a fighter tells me he's driving during our phone interview, I worry that he'll get distracted and crash. No reporter wants to be the one to tell Dana White, "Um, yeah, so I was asking him about rumored pay cuts, and... boom! Sorry, man."

Forida State Boxing Commission Exonerates EliteXC, Clearing Way for Company's Sale to CBS

The Florida State Boxing Commission has concluded that no wrongdoing occurred in the Kimbo Slice/Seth Petruzelli bout from EliteXC's ill-fated October 4th card. Allegations of fight-fixing arose after Petruzelli claimed in a post-event radio interview that he was paid extra to keep the fight standing, with the resulting uproar over "Standgate" prompting the FSBC's investigation. "Dis is wicked news," said EliteXC figurehead Jared Shaw. "Now naffink stands in da way hof CBS buyin' us. Booyakasha!"