Sunday, August 2, 2015

The Perils of Going to Jones Beach, MMA Edition


Ask any New Yorker and they'll tell you: There are some really good beaches in the state, but of them all, Jones Beach is total butt.

Unlike Fire Island, which you must travel by ferry to get to (thereby making it more exclusive), and the Hamptons, which are so snooty even the sharks wear polo shirts, Jones Beach is the Mos Eisley Spaceport of beaches. It's where the dregs of society go to drink and throw up - and if you're a UFC fighter, it's where you're assailed by yahoos keen on testing your wrestling.