Friday, August 6, 2010

Predictions for UFC 117: "Ultimate Big Mouth Strikes Again"

There are compelling match-ups based on the competitiveness of the fighters, and there are compelling match-ups based on the verbal diarrhea those fighters have spewed.  With the insanity that’s come out of his mouth leading up to this Saturday UFC 117, Chael Sonnen’s impending scrap with middleweight champ Anderson Silva is clearly compelling of the “diarrhea” variety – and I mean that in the best possible way.  Because let’s face it, aside from his destruction of Forrest Griffin a year ago, Silva’s been phoning it in since he and Patrick Cote did the man-dance back in 2008.  Sonnen, in the meantime, defeated Dan Miller then smoked Yushin Okami and Nate Marquardt, all the while running his yap and transforming himself into one of the most interesting guys out there.  And who would you rather have as champ?  A stoic non-speaking Brazilian who looks like he’d rather be at the disco than in the cage or a quote-factory with no compunctions about getting his hands dirty and throwing down?  Anyhoo, predictions.

    • Roy Nelson has thus far had it pretty easy in the Octagon, which is the same treatment all TUF winners get when they get put into the regular rotation.  But despite the fact that opponent Junior dos Santos is a step up in competition, Nelson still wields his secret weapon: the Mullet of Doom.  Expect dos Santos to lose via TKO due to luxurious locks of unrepentant Southern redneck-ness, because two million NASCAR fans can’t be wrong.
    • Matt Hughes sports a mullet in his old high school pics.  Ricardo Almeida does not, but if you go to his grade school yearbook, you can clearly see a youngster with a well-coifed bouffant that pays homage to Elvis Presley.  Almeida via rear naked choke.
    • Clay Guida wins anything to do with hair, hands down.  Rafael dos Santos is losing via TKO.
    • Thiago Alves seems to be incapable of growing hair on his head.  When Jon Fitch wakes up every morning, coach Dave Camarillo has to talk him down from the Jheri Curl ledge.  Fitch via decision.
    • Silva has no hair.  Sonnen does.  That, plus his big mouth, means he’s coming away with the belt.