Thursday, March 12, 2009
The anabolic steroids Stanozolol, Norandrosterone and Noretiocholanolone have tested positive for aging MMA legend Ken Shamrock and have been suspended for one year, according to a statement released yesterday by the anabolic steroid Deca-Durabolin. The positive test result comes after a post-fight screening for the February 13th Wargods event in California, an event that saw Shamrock defeat some laughably overweight dude via first-round armbar. "Shameful," said the steroid Sustanon. "That's all I have to say about it. It's just shameful." Added the human growth hormone Somatropin, which is used by a wide range of athletes and is virtually undetectable by current screening techniques, "This sort of thing simply will not be tolerated. I mean, Ken Shamrock? Really? Come on."