Breaking News: Larry Hazzard Fired

Larry Hazzard, Commissioner of the New Jersey State Athletic Control Board and one of the men most responsible for the Unified Rules of Mixed Martial Arts and the widespread acceptance of the sport, was fired by the state Attorney General yesterday according to a report by the New Brunswick Home News Tribune. Hazzard is highly respected in boxing and MMA circles, and has been at his post for over two decades. MMA Journalist would like to take this moment to say: "Holy crap".

Who Should Jake Shields Fight?

Jake Shields - the man, the myth, the grappling stud and EliteXC welterweight star. This past weekend Shields dispatched Mike Pyle in less than a round, and further established himself as one of the top 170-pounders not fighting for the UFC. So who should Shields fight next? I can think of three East Coast badasses... 1. Eddie Alvarez: A wrestler with heavy, heavy hands, this former BodogFIGHT champ has only one chink in his armor, and that's taller, lankier opponents with accurate striking. In other words, Alvarez probably wouldn't have much of a problem with Shields. 2. Lyman Good: Insanely well-conditioned, and possessing dangerous skills both on the feet and on the ground, Good absolutely handled Mike Dolce at a recent IFL - much like Good has handled every opponent he's faced. And he'd probably handle Shields, too. 3. Chris Ligouri: Rock-solid grappling mixed with rock-solid boxing and Muay Thai. That's Ligouri, who's been in the game practically forever (he even fought in the UFC back in 2003) and has survived many a war. Ligouri will be venturing into the lightweight division at the next Ring of Combat, but win or lose, he'll always be the same scrappy welterweight who'd make Jake Shields eat leather.

TUF 7 Open Casting Call - 11/19 in New Jersey

Do you like to urinate in other people's beds? Do you drink to excess and throw furniture in pools? Do you have at least three tattoos, a social disorder or an undiagnosed neurosis? Then the open casting call for the seventh season of SpikeTV's "The Ultimate Fighter" is just the thing for you! Come on down to the Newark Airport Hilton Hotel in Newark, New Jersey on Monday, November 19th and a shot at ignominy and ridicule can be yours. Dana White and representatives of SpikeTV will be on hand to evaluate middleweights only, and the start time is 8:00am sharp. Good luck!* (*No fighting experience or MMA training required.)

Observations from My Couch: EliteXC "Renegades"

-The Nick Diaz that fought last night was nothing like the one that battled against Diego Sanchez, Sean Sherk and Robbie Lawler. Diaz is a great fighter, but he needs to lay off the staph-laced marijuana for a while. -I don't blame Bo Cantrell for getting hit by Kimbo twice and tapping out. If I were in his shoes, I would've tapped out after the referee had us touch gloves. -Jake Shields and KJ Noons looked impressive in victory. However, Gary Shaw has suggested that for their next fights they will both face Kimbo simultaneously, and I'm not sure I like their odds. -My dog is a fan of Goldberg, and whenever the ex-wrestler was on screen he'd bark and wag his tail. Unfortunately, whenever Stephen Quadros was on screen, my poor dog would yelp and hide behind the couch.

A Collection of News Hiaku

1. No dice for ShoXC/December 7th NJ show./ProElite forsakes us. 2. Cali commission/postpones the steroid hearing./Sean Sherk really screwed. 3. Zuffa signs Lesnar./Does anyone actually care?/I sure as hell don't. 4. Rio Heroes gives fans/some old-school NHB bouts./But their video sucks. 5. Kimbo Slice and Nick/Diaz fight on Saturday night./Not each other though.

ROC and HDNet Fights Have Hooked Up, Possibly Dating

Lou Neglia's Ring of Combat, an MMA mainstay here on the East Coast that has served up quality events for years, and Mark Cuban's HDNet Fights, a newly-launched league that airs on the high-definition channel, have hooked up, according to a recent ROC press release. The press release confirms what many already suspected, as the two organizations were seen chatting each other up at a party, and left "to get some fresh air" after downing a few cocktails. What does this mean for the jealous Art of War promotion, who HDNet Fights was officially seeing? That's unclear at this time, although what is clear is that ROC's November 30th "Beasts of the Northeast" tournament finals will be broadcast on the channel.

ShoXC is Coming to Town to Spread Tidings of Good Cheer

ShoXC, the WEC-esque version of EliteXC's brand of global MMA, is coming to town on December 7th to spread tidings of good cheer ("town" being the Collins Arena at Brookdale College in Lincroft, New Jersey, and "tidings of good cheer" being a great opportunity for some local fighters to kick ass on the Showtime cable network). Combat in the Cage promoter Ed Hsu is working point on this one, and he's alluded to a headlining bout between Cage Rage veteran Paul Daley and hometown boy Jose Rodriguez. Want to see an event where the live audience goes beserk? Curious about what happens when an event erupts into a riot? Since Rodriguez is known as a big ticket seller in the Garden State, and he lives about five minutes from the venue, this will definitely be the show for you.

The Week in Review

It's been a busy week for news. Here's a brief recap of a few of the week's more important MMA-related events, courtesy of the hard-working staff at MMA Journalist. The Couture/Zuffa Breakup Gets Uglier- Another day, another press conference, this one featuring Dana White and Lorenzo Fertitta describing how they would cook and clean all day only to face a cold and distant Randy Couture at dinner time. Was Couture cheating on them? Were they too clingy? It's hard to tell, but things are going to be awkward at the next dinner party. Din Thomas Arrested- Want to throw a little unsanctioned smoker in your gym? Maybe you want to give your students some experience fighting in front of a crowd? Well, if you live in the sunny state of Florida - AND YOU'RE BLACK - watch the fuck out. I'm just saying... A Change in the IFL Product- Newly-minted IFL president Jay Larkin says the league is going to shift from their current city-based team motif to teams based on actual fight camps. Also, to attract more fans, competitors will be allowed to use chainsaws, swords and axes, and an agitated and hungry lion or bear will be thrown into the ring in bouts that make it to the third round. Sean Sherk's Steroid Appeal Postponed- Yesterday's California State Athletic Commission hearing on the appeal of the steroid-based suspension of the UFC Lightweight Champ ended in a postponement to November 13th. Credit goes to CSAC administrative assistant Lucy Sanders, who had to get her hair and nails done and totally forgot to circulate the defense's brief. Oopsie!

Okay, My Crystal Ball Sucks

Back in September, MMA Journalist gazed into its crystal ball and tried to get a handle on the November 30th final round of the Ring of Combat "Beasts of the Northeast" tournament. Well, it turns out Eddie Fyvie would bang up his knee and have to drop out, Joe Aviles couldn't stop Charlie Brenneman's takedowns, and Marc Stevens failed to out-hustle Lance Everson. Go on. Say it. My crystal ball sucks. However, it doesn't take a crystal ball to see how things will play out now that the final match-ups have been determined. For example, in the lightweight bracket, Dave Sachs will test his ground game against Brian McLaughlin. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that McLaughlin will remove one of Sachs' limbs and beat him over the head with it. In the welterweight bracket, Mark Berraciol will square off against Charlie Brenneman. There will be no lay-and-pray in this one; expect Brenneman to put Berraciol on his back and pound on him for the duration. In the middleweight match-up, Mike Massenzio will take on the aforementioned Everson. Considering that Massenzio is a well-credentialed wrestler who walks around at about 300 pounds and cuts to 185, Everson will have his hands full. Rounding out the tournament, John Doyle will meet Ricardo Romero at light-heavyweight in a battle of mean dispositions. Whoever wins this one will most likely eat kittens and steal Christmas presents after the show. Fault the MMA Journalist crystal ball all you want, but you can take these predictions to the bank!

Velasquez and LaDonna's Battle for Ethnic Dominance the ROC16 Fight of the Night

When Tom Velasquez and Anthony "Guido" LaDonna have a battle that ends up being the Ring of Combat 16 fight of the night, a wealth of jokes spring to mind. I mean, come on! Velasquez versus "Guido"? But MMA Journalist won't go there, because that bout - which saw Velasquez put LaDonna through the submission ringer in Round One, and LaDonna tear Velasquez up on the feet in the second round before getting caught with a lightning-quick heelhook in the third - should get nothing but praise. No satire, no sarcasm, no snarkiness. Just praise. Velasquez and LaDonna fought with heart, and their efforts when the chokes, armbars, fists and shins were flying deserve a heaping portion of accolades and a healthy serving of respect.