Friday, December 4, 2009

Predictions for TUF 10 Finale: "Kimbo Slice Rides Again!"

Once again a season of TUF draws to a close, and once again viewers are stricken with a profound sense of loss.  Loss at having wasted time watching the damn show, that is.  Yeah, yeah, Kimbo Slice was compelling, and there was thankfully very little white-trash or gay antics peppered throughout like bits of broken glass in a bowl of pork fried rice.  But still, the show is stale.  Does anyone even remember who fought besides Roy Nelson, Brendan Schaub, Kimbo and maybe Marcus Jones?  No!  No one was memorable and nothing happened that was interesting.  Anyway, the TUF 10 live finale is on SpikeTV on Saturday, so… predictions!

    • To prepare for his match-up against the portly Nelson, Schaub has been focusing on conditioning, cardio and striking.  To prepare for Schaub, Nelson ate an entire moose, including the horns.  Nelson via TKO.
    • Kimbo is facing Houston Alexander.  They’re going to throw bombs, and end up with the first double-knockout in Octagon history.
    • Matt Hamill is going to outpoint Jon Jones.  He will not, however, hear Bruce Buffer declare him the winner.
    • Frankie Edgar via summers at the Jersey Shore, driving around in a tricked out Iroc-Z with massive amounts of gel in his hair and hours and hours of time spent in a tanning booth.
    • Marcus Jones against Matt Mitrione?  The most likeable TUF 10er against the most hated?  Jones by limb-rending submission, and then he’s going to weep from the depths of his heart over the violence.

No comments: