Thursday, April 15, 2010

Predictions for Strikeforce: "Nashville", or "STFU! The Damn Thing Is Free!"

Say what you want about Strikeforce and its latest CBS offering – “This is make or break for them,” “Where’s my damn Fedor?” or “I have trouble finding Nashville on the map.  Is it in France?”  But the bottom line is this: we get to watch Dan Henderson stomp Jake Shields, Gegard Mousasi put his fist through King Mo’s torso and Shinya Aoki detach Gilbert Melendez’s leg and toss it into the audience, and we get to watch it for free.  So shut your trap!  Predictions:

    • Jason Miller is fighting Tim Stout, which is the equivalent of speeding up an entire season of MTV’s “The Real World” so it’s condensed into one 15-minute mass of confusion.  And no, I have no idea what that means.  Miller via rear naked choke and funny faces.
    • Aoki sucks at wrestling and striking, but the dude is the master of grievous injuries brought about by slick submissions.  After Saturday night, Melendez will be walking with a limp for at least two months.
    • Muhammad Lawal is a very promising up-and-comer with heavy hands and a killer wrestling background.  Unfortunately, his biggest win to date is against Mike “I washed out of TUF” Whitehead.  Mousasi is going to smoke him like a hookah stuffed with funky Armenian tobacco.
    • I have no idea what that means.
    • Henderson versus Shields?  Bye-bye Jake.  We hardly knew ya.

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