Free UFC 95 Card Worth Every Penny

This Saturday is UFC 95, another magnum opus from London, England broadcast for free on SpikeTV, and based on the line-up alone, this baby will clearly be worth every penny. In the main event, Diego Sanchez will pit his top-level submission skills against those of Joe "Worst Jiu-Jitsu Ever" Stevenson in what promises to a barn-burner (that is, a barn that you're currently living in, and when it catches fire all the animals panic and trample your stuff as you make your escape). In the co-main event... heck, I can't even tell which bout is the co-main event. They're all so worthy of that title! Josh Koscheck is fighting no one of importance, Rory "I've Only Fought in the UFC Once" Markham is taking on one of the Hardy Boys (I think it's the one with the long hair that fooled around with Nancy Drew on that class picnic), and Wilson Gouveia and Nate Marquardt are set to clash in a donnybrook that should determine who gets to eat at Applebee's for the next month and who's stuck eating ramen noodles. And the under card... wow. Just wow. The mere thought of fighters I've never heard of, like Stefan Struve and Evan Dunham and Brian Cobb, getting a crack at their share of Octagon glory... I'm so excited about it I can barely think straight. Hey, I know this UFC is free, but is there someplace I could just mail a check to? I'm going to feel like I'm robbing Zuffa on Saturday, and I don't know if I can live with that.