Observations From My Couch: Strikeforce's "Gina Got Her Ass Kicked"

• Fabricio Werdum's jiu-jitsu looked solid. It's possible that his skill-level will enable him to survive maybe 30 seconds with Fedor before he's killed.
• Kudos to Gilbert Melendez for keeping the Jheri curl alive and in the public eye.
• What Gegard Mousasi did to Renato "Babalu" Sobral cannot be considered fighting. That was some grassy knoll-sniper stuff right there. Babalu never even had a chance.
• Cyborg crushed Gina Carano to become the 145-pound champ. After watching that bout, WEC featherweight champ Mike Brown reportedly called his management to discuss a move out of the weight class. It took them an hour to make the terrified Brown understand that he'd never have to fight Cyborg, as she fights in the women's division.

Predictions for Strikeforce: "Carano vs. Cyborg"

• Jay Hieron will be declared the winner by disqualification when, after seeing opponent Jesse Taylor stumble, slur his words and vomit three times on the way to the ring, officials determine that Taylor is intoxicated to the point of blacking out.
• Renato "Babalu" Sobral and Gegard Mousasi will wage an absolute war over the Strikeforce light-heavyweight belt. But no matter what the outcome, Babalu's finely-coiffed hair will remain pristine.
• Utilizing world-class jiu-jitsu, Fabricio Werdum is going to get Mike Kyle down and mount him. Kyle will then produce a taser and stun the Brazilian, and when he's disqualified for cheating, he'll claim it was just "a heat of the moment thing".
• Gilbert Melendez and Mitsuhiro Ishida are just going to wrestle. That's it. Just wrestle.
• Gina Carano will defeat Cristiane "Cyborg" Santos after a long, protracted battle. She will, unfortunately, sustain a bite in the bout, and during the next full moon will temporarily transform into a feral Brazilian jungle cat.

Babalu Out of Strikeforce Bout with Rafael "Feijao" Cavalcante; Who Should Replace Him?

Renato "Babalu" Sobral is out of his scheduled June 6th Strikeforce bout against Rafael "Feijao" Cavalcante (a spikey-hair injury is rumored to be the culprit). Who should replace Babalu in this light-heavyweight title fight? The Northeast's top 205-pounder, of course, which would be Ricardo Romero. Romero just fought at ROC 24 on Friday, easily dispatching Greg Jackson-trained James McSweeney with the kind of wrestling and ground game dominance that would translate into Feijao eating more than a few face-fulls of leather before the night is through. And while the Brazilian definitely has some heavy hands himself - as evidenced by his KO and TKO wins in EliteXC and the IFL - those heavy hands would be swinging while Feijao is lying flat on his back, as Romero's wrestling has been used to get every single one of his opponents to the ground and keep them there. Ricardo Romero, therefore, gets my vote as Babalu's replacement.

Observations from My Couch: Affliction "Banned"

- Matt Lindland edged out Brazilian newcomer Fabio "Negao" Nascimento for the unanimous decision win after a grueling three-round fight, which served to remind fans yet again that the "Law" is boring as hell. Boring. As. Hell. - Megadeth? Really? - Antonio Rogerio Nogueira, Mike Pyle, Babalu, Mark Hominick and Vitor Belfort all scored victories by various means. According to the promoter, they will all fight champ Fedor Emelianenko simultaneously at the next event. Pyle and Hominick are even allowed to bring guns. - Megadeth? Seriously? - Josh Barnett's KO of Pedro Rizzo was a thing of beauty, and avenged Barnett's 2001 loss to the Brazilian slugger. Rizzo now must return Barnett's collection of Robotech: "The Macross Saga" DVDs and life-size Gundam replica. - Andre Arlovski crushed Ben Rothwell's soul. That's it. Nothing more needs to be said. - Megadeth? Really? This isn't some sort of joke? - Fedor's bout with Tim Sylvia lasted only 36 seconds. Why so quick? Fedor wanted to get back home so he could watch UFC Fight Night 14 on DVR.