What We Learned From Sengoku 7

Sengoku 7 - not quite Pride in its glory days, not quite an old Shooto event taking place in a gymnasium. Right on. So what did we learn?

• Dave Herman really needs to train for bouts longer than one round. Or at least run on a treadmill, ride a stationary bike or maybe swim to work or something. His cardio was suckeriffic.
• Antonio "Bigfoot" Silva prefers competing in Japan to being licensed to fight in the United States ever, ever again.
• Muhammed Lawal, a.k.a. "King Mo", gets more kingly and royal with each appearance. I predict his next ring entrance will entail him sitting upon a throne while two dozen tiny Japanese girls struggle to carry said throne from backstage to ringside.
• Jorge Santiago is one of the baddest middleweights around not good enough for the UFC.
• Takanori Gomi - phooey!

Observations from My Couch: ShoXC 10/10

• A Brazilian whose nickname is "Tractor" lost to a man whose last name sounds an awful lot like "beer bong"... Sorry, I got nothing.
• Alexander Shlemenko took the best Bubba McDaniel had to offer on the ground, and in the closing seconds of the first round the Russian planted a flying knee into McDaniel's ribs that left him writhing in pain on the floor of the cage for quite some time. In fact, according to reports, McDaniels was writhing in pain on the dance floor at the after party, and his writhing continued long after he checked out of the fighters' hotel the next day.
• Jason Guida looked very impressive pushing that much smaller referee. Since his career in MMA doesn't seem to be working out, perhaps Guida might find success as a schoolyard bully.
• Kerry Schall may have lost to Dave Herman via TKO in just a little over a minute, but it was a moral victory for the man known as "Meat Truck". After all, he did not get kneed or kicked in the groin, nor did he fall out of the ring and onto a folding chair.

Tonight's ShoXC to Feature More Bribes and Fixed Fights

MMA Journalist has just received a fax from an EliteXC insider regarding tonight's ShoXC event in Hammond, Indiana. The event, which will be broadcast live on Showtime, will feature Dave Herman taking on TUF veteran Kerry Schall, as well as bouts with TUF washout Jason Guida and rising stars Anthony Lapsley and Bubba McDaniel. The fax - deemed to be credible as this source (which will remained unnamed) is a reliable one - seems to list the "under the table" bribes the competitors are receiving to ensure a specific performance. The list is as follows:

• Herman will be paid an additional $5,000 to not reveal why he is called "PeeWee" on national television.
• Schall will be paid an additional $2,000 if he promises to not offer Herman ride in his "Meat Truck".
• Guida will be paid an additional $10,000 if he successfully keeps his scrotum hidden from view.
• Lapsely will receive $500 worth of marijuana if he passes his post-fight drug screening.
• McDaniel will be given a real first name if victorious. Come on, "Bubba"? Seriously?