MMA Journalist to Liveblog 12/13 Asylum Fight League Show

MMA Journalist will be cageside for the Asylum Fight League amateur MMA show tomorrow night at the Raritan Center in Edison, New Jersey, and provided my Blackberry has a signal, I will liveblog the event. There should be two title fights and a card of 12-15 bouts. Woot-woot.

Five Reasons Why Phillipe Nover Will Beat Efrain Escudero

TUF 8 finalists Phillipe Nover and Efrain Escudero will duke it out tomorrow night at the TUF finale on SpikeTV, which will determine who is this season's Ultimate Fighter and who will be relegated to mowing Dana White's lawn on the weekends for extra cash. In light of White and coach Nogueira's high praise, which was lavished on the Brooklyn native once he started clobbering foes in the Octagon like the Fantastic Four's "Thing" clobbers run-of-the-mill bank robbers, does the undefeated Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belt Escudero stand a chance? Um, unless Nover slips on a banana peel on his way to the cage, the answer is "no". Here are five reason why Nover will win:

1. Not only was Nover recently awarded his jiu-jitsu black belt by Alexandre "Soca" Freitas, but he was issued a license to kill by Her Majesty's Secret Service and was made an honorary Power Ranger.
2. According to the prophecy, "No man born of Earth can harm the one they call Phillipe Nover".
3. The movie "Cloverfield" was inspired by the night Nover went out in Manhattan, had a little too much to drink and toppled three office buildings.
4. Nover got over his allergy to Kryptonite a long time ago. Now it just tastes bitter.
5. Nover has superpowers. Escudero does not.

New Jersey Killers to Spill Blood in New York

New Jersey killers Kevin Roddy and Steve DeAngelis will be in upstate New York on Saturday night, spilling blood at the "There Will Be Blood" MMA show at the Gil Lay Arena on the Seneca Nation Indian reservation (outside of Buffalo). The event features an undercard of amateur bouts and a trio of pro bouts, with Roddy (recently promoted to brown belt by trainer Kurt Pellegrino) and BCX featherweight champ DeAngelis taking on and likely murdering durable kickboxer Peter Kaljevic and striker Paul Compton. Said arena janitor Jerome Woods, "Roddy and DeAngelis? Ugh. I'm gonna go get my mop ready. There definitely will be blood."

Observations from My Couch: UFC "Fight for the Troops"

• Most. Depressing. UFC. Ever. Seriously, I love me some fights, but all those vignettes about wounded soldiers was heartbreaking.
• For this event the ratio of clobbered fighters to non-clobbered fighters at the end of the night was insane. Corey Hill had his shin snapped in half in an unaired preliminary bout (check it out on the UFC website), another fighter wound up with a busted arm, and more than a few did their best to give viewers an firsthand look at just what this Traumatic Brain Injury thing is all about.
• Jim Miller's domination of Matt Wiman was so complete, Wiman had to see a rape counselor after the bout.
• Kudos to Razak Al-Hassan for reminding us how useless Tae Kwon Do is in an MMA fight.
• Nate Loughran's game plan of letting Tim Credeur repeatedly punch him in the face came so close to paying off. So close.
• Jonathan Goulet and Yoshiyuki Yoshida: getting knocked the hell out and going into convulsions so you don't have to.

Predictions for UFC "Fight for the Troops"

Tonight's UFC "Fight for the Troops" event, intended to raise money for the Intrepid Fallen Heroes Fund and broadcast live on SpikeTV from the Crown Coliseum outside of Fort Bragg, features no real big-name fighters. But there are a number of compelling match-ups in store, so MMA Journalist has put together bout predictions for the free event:

• In the opening bout of the evening, light-heavyweights Duke (from GI Joe) and Destro (from Cobra) will clash in what should be a classic "striker vs. international arms dealer/terrorist" fight. Expect Duke to come out on top after a three-round donnybrook.
• In the welterweight division, ninjas Snake Eyes (GI Joe) and Storm Shadow (Cobra) - who used to train at the same gym - will battle it out for the honor of their clan. Regardless of what happens in the cage, the ultimate winner in this one is the fans.
• The UFC's first female MMA bout will feature Scarlett (GI Joe) taking on the Baroness (Cobra), and if Scarlett is allowed to use her crossbow, she should be able to dispatch her opponent via TKO in short order.
• In the main event, US Marine Corp exponent Gung Ho (GI Joe) will take on Serpentor (Cobra), who is comprised of the DNA of Julius Caeser, Napolean Bonaparte, Attila the Hun and a common garden snake. Gung Ho should have a rough time of it, but Serpentor might get distracted by that massive globe and anchor tattoo on his chest long enough for Gung Ho to pull off a submission.

Bigfoot Flees US to Go Where Monsters Are Appreciated

Antonio "Bigfoot" Silva, the only heavyweight champ EliteXC crowned and the recipient of a healthy suspension by the California State Athletic Commission for being a steroidal monster, has fled the United States to compete in Japan's January 4th Sengoku event. The American Top Team fighter's exodus is not unprecedented. Japan, with its accepting culture, has traditionally been home to many monsters, monsters such as Godzilla, the giant turtle Gamera and Bob Sapp. Bigfoot, well-known for his appetite for food and designer footware, will no doubt have more opportunities to compete and earn mone. The downside, however, is that, as he's ignoring his CSAC suspension and fighting overseas, he will have a rough time getting licensed again Stateside. Only time will tell if Bigfoot's decision to flee is the right one.

Chuck Liddell Found High on Cold Medicine, Training at ATT

Former UFC light-heavyweight champ Chuck Liddell, who went missing last week from his longtime gym The Pit in San Luis Obispo, California, has turned up at the American Top Team gym in Florida incoherent and high on cold medicine. The erstwhile Octagon star, coming off a shocking knockout loss to Rashad Evans at UFC 88, reportedly was at the ATT facility training hard - and despite his altered mental state, is purported to have made great strides in his overall game. "Yeah, I pulled into the parking lot and he was asleep on the doorstep," said ATT Head Substance Abuse Counselor Ricardo Liborio. "But he's been working hard, so hey, why not?" Liddell currently has no UFC bouts scheduled, although rumors of another rematch with Randy Couture were recently quashed.

Kimbo Slice in Japan to Check Out Their Bread

Kimbo Slice is in Japan this weekend, reportedly there for color commentary duties with the striking-only organization K-1, but according to industry insiders the former EliteXC superstar is also in the Land of the Rising Sun to check out their selection of bread. Although Slice is well-known for his love of white bread, rye bread and long loaves of French bread, he has often expressed an interest in the baked products of other nations. Said longtime manager "IceyMike" Imber, who accompanied Slice to Japan, "Kimbo's definitely liking it here. They have Melonpan, which is an enriched dough covered in a thin layer of crispy cookie dough, as well as panko, a variety of breadcrumb, and the sweet, red bean paste-filled Anpan. It's all good."

Preliminary February 6th WCA Card Released

The preliminary card for the World Cagefighting Alliance's February 6th inaugural event at Boardwalk Hall has been released, and MMA Journalist feels very optimistic about what's been put on paper. Instead of spending the entire budget on talent that won't sell tickets, matchmaker Gary Marino has wisely put together a roster of local draws - a fact that bodes well for any New Jersey promotion interested in staying in business longer than a show or two. Here's the card, subject to change of course:

1. Tom Gallicchio vs. Rich Ashkar - a welterweight bout that was supposed to be a title fight at the last ROC.
2. Matt Lee vs. TBA - Lee is a tough-as-nails lightweight and took Eddie Alvarez the distance at a BodogFIGHT.
3. Al Buck vs. Jose Rodriguez - a welterweight battle between two huge ticket sellers.
4. Doug Gordon vs. Mike Medrano - two very strong welterweights with promising futures.
5. Chris Schlesinger vs. Andrew Calandrelli - a lightweight scrap featuring excellent grapplers.
6. Mahnseah Boley vs. Pat Collins - a heavyweight Bombsquad vs. AMA FC/Team Renzo bout.
7. Kevin Roddy vs. TBA - Roddy is exciting and one of the best featherweights in the Garden State.
8. Ryan Smith vs. Anthony D'Angelo - welterweight D'Angelo is a dangerous fighter, and has been a force at New Jersey shows for years.
9. Lester Caslow vs. Pat White - featherweight Caslow is a very talented up-and-comer.
10. Brian DeMuro vs. Eric Henry - Team Balance vs. Bombsquad at welterweight.
11. Steve DeAngelis vs. Doug Solnier - DeAngelis is a top-ranked featherweight and BCX champ.
12. Anthony Leone vs. Joey Camacho - Camacho is another tough featherweight.
13. Daniel Tavares vs. Brian Danner - two relative newcomers.

Of Zombies and Dark Magic

Rumors are circulating that ProElite is very close to being bought, and that Zombie EliteXC will rise to shamble around and give us more MMA bouts, so MMA Journalist would like to talk about the concept of zombies and the dark magic that creates them. First, a little history: in 2000 the UFC was owned by Bob Meyrowitz and his company, Semaphore Entertainment Group, and as everyone knows the organization was close to death - so close, in fact, that Meyrowitz was interested in selling and (supposedly) people like Monte Cox and promoter Jamie Levine were considering pooling their dough to buy it. Why? The UFC had grown into a brand, which meant that it was a potentially viable product with solid public recognition, and given the right guidance it could, at some point, make money. Of course, we all know that Zuffa came in and turned the whole organization around, but the thing to take away from that is branding can give something a life of its own - a soul, if you will - and sometimes death will hold little sway over it. Well, with EliteXC's Showtime and CBS contracts and its roster of fighters and other assets, the damn thing developed a soul. After all, the number one and number three most-watched MMA bouts in US history took place in EliteXC's cage - the public knows it as a product. Death, or bankruptcy, will ultimately hold little sway over it, and all it should take is a little dark magic (in the form of some decent lawyers, a buyer and a strong staff) before EliteXC rises from its grave to chomp on us again. Personally, I will relish the bite.