Because There's A Fistfight Going On Somewhere In New York Right Now, And You Should Know About It
Friday, September 10, 2010
Liveblog: UCC 3 Part 2
A body blow from him means you're losing your lunch.
Adam Schortz's last name describes an article of clothes.
But if you make fun of this bantanweight, he will punch you in the nose.
The carnage is sudden, the bloodshed is fast.
In the blink of an eye Ledesma's kicking Schortz's ass.
The ref's seen enough, he'll take no part in the slaughter.
It's not like Schortz has slept with his daughter.
Ledesma's the victor and his face wears a grin.
He fought hard and strong, and came away with the win.
Doug Miller's in the cage now, Rich Van Houton's there too,
A pair of mean featherweights with something to prove.
Van Houton gets a slam and he ends up on top.
The crowd goes wild - in pro wrestling parlance, that's a "pop".
But Miller rallies back, and lengthens the fight.
He won't go down easy, he wants to win on this night.
The ending is brutal, violent and quick.
Dr. Wurmser whispers to Nick Lembo, "Ugh, I think I'm gonna be sick."
Van Houton's too much, his fists are like stone.
Miller crumbles. This bout is done.
Liveblog: UCC 3 Part 1
Walking from the PATH train to the venue can give you a fright.
But MMA Journalist braved it and he did it for you.
Covering fight shows in New York and New Jersey, yeah, that's what I do.
"Wait," you may say, "This blog, it does rhyme."
"You're smart," I will tell you, "although not all the time."
You see, there's so many blogs out there - what sets this one apart?
Well, I cover MMA and my work is like art.
So hold on to your hats for event coverage like no other.
Badass UCC reporting in verse? Look no further my brother.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Observations from My Couch: Bellator 28 "Ultimate... No, Wait. Not Ultimate"
- Anthony Leone looked way too small for 145 pounds. I'd like to see him at 135. There, he'd be beastly.
- Matt Horwich seemed flat, like, I don't know, maybe he fought a high-level opponent three weeks ago, wasn't fully recovered and lacked his usual pep. But hey, what do I know?
- Rich Clementi wuz robbed. Way robbed. No way did Carey Vanier earn that decision.
- Do referees in Louisiana not know that kneeing a downed opponent in the chops is illegal? Is it just simply all vale tudo down there?
- What Eric Larkin did to Marcus Andrusia is the closest thing to rape a man can do to another man without having to register as a sex offender afterwards.
Listen. Do You Hear That? That's the Sound of Market Upswing
Seanbaby is to MMA Articles What Frankie Edgar is to Lightweight Fighters
When I die I hope to be reincarnated as Seanbaby's keyboard. You know, so I can be part of the magic. Here's his latest: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-6-least-sportsmanlike-moments-in-mma/.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Todd Duffee Cut by UFC; Wound Said to be Superficial
Heavyweight up-and-comer Todd Duffee was reportedly cut by the UFC yesterday, and though first-hand accounts of the assault are unclear, it's said the wound was mostly superficial. Duffee made a big splash in his UFC debut in August, 2009, earning a seven-second KO over Tim Hague. But injuries kept him out of the Octagon until May of this year, when, at UFC 114: "Rampage vs. Evans", the towering goliath brutally pounded on Mike Russow for two and half rounds and then was abruptly knocked out himself. "Of course it comes as a shock," said Duffee's manager, Alex Davis. "I mean, we thought everything was cool, but when Todd was waiting in the cafeteria lunch line, Dana [White] came out of no where and shanked him a bunch of pencils taped together. And the guards did nothing!" What's next for the man with one of the fastest KOs in UFC history? According to Davis, once Duffee gets out of the infirmary he'll likely get a gig in the library. "You know, delivering books or something."
UCC 3: A Splendid Time is Guaranteed for All
Installment number three for the Urban Conflict Championship is this Friday at the Armory in Jersey City, and if you brave the treacherous walk from the PATH train to the venue (warning: do not stop to buy crack, even if tempted), you will be treated to some stellar cage fights. Daniel Akinyemi is mentioned in a previous post, but there are others worth the price of admission. They include:
- Luiz Azeredo – A Pride Bushido veteran, Azeredo boasts a win over Brit slugger Paul Daley plus a ton of fights in Brazil.
- Binky Jones – A Baltimore-based jiu-jitsu man, Jones has been around the Northeast scene forever. His crowning achievement was winning the ROC lightweight “Tournament of Champions”.
- Kevin Horowitz – A ton of spunk and game as hell. That’s Horowitz, who reps the Rhino Fight Team and has mastered the art of out-boxing wrestlers and out-wrestling boxers (see Horowitz vs. Anthony Abatelli and Horowitz vs. Adam Rosello).
- Claudio Ledesma – Although he ran into a brick wall when he faced TSMMA’s Jimmie Rivera, Ledesma is still a tough jiu-jitsu specialist with KO power.
- Josh Key – Key got screwed in his bout against Hitalo Machado at UCC 1 when the ref stepped in prematurely, and his bad luck continued with a “no contest” at an M-1 Global show in June, but he’s still a powerful, powerful grappler and fierce competitor. Watch for him to slam opponent Mike Winters into unconsciousness the first chance he gets.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Shine Fights Upcoming Lightweight Grand Prix to Feature Nothing, Absolutely Nothing
In today's installment of "As the Shine Fights Turns", the Oklahoma State Athletic Commission promises to suspend all fighters who compete on the eight-man lightweight tournament planned for Shine Fight's September 10th card, a card that went from the unloving embrace of the Virginia commission to the barren, unsanctioned wasteland of the First Council Casino of the Otoe-Missouria Tribe. Meanwhile, Shine Fights' Minister of Information Jason Chambers continues to insist that all is well and that the sudden change of venue was prompted by the Virginia commission's insistence that a licensed matchmaker make the lightweight grand prix match-ups - a claim the Virginia commission refutes (Commission Program Director James Holland: "Hey, I don't know much about MMA and licensing shows, but I think you need a bond. Any idea what that is? I don't."). In Brazil, tournament competitor Marcus Aurelio begins sweating over the possible suspension he'll face, worried that it will jeopardize his participation in the DREAM 16 event in Japan and impede his ability to pay for the kidney stone operation his pet cat "Fifi" desperately needs. And back in Fairfax, fans who purchased tickets are still scratching their heads over what they're going to do on Friday night now that their plans of drinking a twelve-pack of Miller Lite and vomiting on the floor of the Patriot Center's main concourse are kaput.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Everything You Wanted To Know About Zach Makovsky But Were Afraid To Ask
Yeah, so, Bellator last night, Joe Warren getting his ass kicked before knocking Season 1 champ Joe Soto the hell out. Wahoo. Anyway, the Season 3 bantamweight tournament is in full effect, and prior to the aforementioned featherweight thriller was Philly-based fighter Zach Makovsky, in all his whirling-dervish grappling glory. Of all the 135-pounders taking the field, Makovsky’s got edge in technique, skill and experience, and the smart money has him going all the way. So who is this cat now in the semifinals? Well, get ready for some knowledge, brought to you by your friendly neighborhood MMA Journalist (who’s been cageside for eight of Makovsky’s 11 fights).
- Makovsky trains out of Philadelphia’s Fight Factory, and like teammate Eddie Alvarez, he blends solid wrestling into a polished overall game. However, whereas Alvarez has got heavy hands, Makovsky’s got amazingly fluid transitions on the ground. He is the master of scrambling, and invariably ends up on top and one move away from a submission every time.
- Four jiu-jitsu black belts. That’s how many Makovsky has fought, and he defeated three of them.
- His only losses were to Wilson Reis at a ShoXC event and to Toshiaki Kitada at DEEP in Japan. Both were by submission, and Reis went on to become EliteXC’s 140-pound champ.
- The only championship belt Makovsky has won thus far was for the Combat in the Cage promotion. His opponent was Emerson Souza, and he out-boxed and out-wrestled the Brazilian to snag the unanimous decision.
- Makovsky likes long walks on the beach, apple pie with homemade whipped cream, and is deathly afraid of clowns.
- Okay, I made that last part up. He loves clowns.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Little Fighter Makes Big Leap
This just in from the Department of Coolness: TSMMA bantamweight stud Nick Pace has just signed a six-fight deal with the WEC. His first fight will be against Demetrious Johnson at WEC 51: "Aldo vs. Gamburyan" on September 30th. Pace is a master grappler who sports flawless transitions, yet he's more than capable of scoring KOs (see his flying knee that took out Collin Tebo at Bellator 11, which will be on the Bellator highlight reel forever). With teammate Lyman Good the current king of the Bellator welterweight mountain, Pace marks the second Team Tiger Schulmann fighter to make it to a national-level show.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Nine Out of Ten Crazy People Agree That BJ Penn Sucks
According to a recent phone survey conducted by the Department of Relevant Knowledge (aka, DORK), nine out of ten crazy people polled fully believe that former UFC lightweight champ BJ Penn sucks. This startling statistic comes on the heels of Penn's defeat at the hands of current champ Frankie Edgar at last weekend's UFC 118 - a clear and convincing loss that stunned many and sent shockwaves through the BJ Penn-nuthugger community. At times considered a "prodigy", a "phenom" and "the greatest lightweight ever", Penn's career highs have included dominate performances and titles in two weight classes, a coaching stint on the Ultimate Fighter, and a best-selling memoir that detailed how much he thinks Dana White is a tool bag. But apparently those accomplishments pale in comparison to his inability to overcome the talent and ability of Edgar, who is considered one of the sport's best representatives of the newest generation of MMA fighter. Unfortunately, now, as per popular crazy person opinion, Penn must face a legacy tarnished with inadequacy and failure. What's left for a diminutive Hawaiian with questionable jiu-jitsu and Tae Kwon Do-esque boxing skills?
Monday, August 30, 2010
Observations from My Couch: UFC 118 "Ultimate Dance-Off 2: Electric Bugaloo"
- Months ago a Zuffa insider lamented to me that Joe Silva was “scraping the bottom of the barrel for fighters”. Hi, Gabe Ruediger! How’s the arm?
- Nik Lentz apparently thought Andre Winner was a big piece of cheese and the Octagon was a cheese grater. How else can you explain him trying to push the Brit through the fence for all three rounds?
- Dan Miller’s guillotine: when done right, no can defend.
- Nate Diaz is so adorable. Even when he’s busting up Marcus Davis’ orbital bone, I have the urge to buy him an ice cream cone and take him to the park to fly kites.
- Gray Maynard is the master of making exciting match-ups into boring ones. Really, he’s elevated it to an art form.
- There are Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu black belts, and then there’s Demian Maia, who may not be able to sub other black belts, but he damn sure can toy with them.
- Randy Couture defeated a boxer. In other news, I hear this scrawny Royce Gracie dude is totally smoking these bigger karate and kung fu fighters. Isn’t that insane?
- It took about two takedowns for Frankie Edgar to convince BJ Penn that every weapon the Hawaiian had at his disposal was useless. After that, it was twenty minutes of Edgar dancing circles around Penn and Penn wanting to be somewhere far, far away.
- Maynard gets the next crack at Edgar, and Edgar is absolutely going to smash him. Don’t believe me? Look at the fighter Edgar was when they first fought and then look at Edgar now. Okay, compare the Maynard who was with the Maynard from now. The champ is a totally different fighter these days – a beast with his hands and an ace on the ground – and the challenger is the same human blanket. Edgar is going to punch “The Bully” in the face for days.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Observations from My Couch: Bellator 26 "Sometimes Girl Fights Make Me Uncomfortable"
- Tyler Stinson and Steve Carl had a short but sweet scrap. Two and a half minutes of back-and-forth near-death is worth tuning in to any day.
- Aisling Daly’s performance speaks volumes on the state of Irish female MMA.
- Two chicks in the north/south position. Dammit, why couldn’t it have been Gina Carano and Meisha Tate in there!
- Jose Vega vs. Danny Tims was fast, furious and fun. Already this bantamweight tournament is paying off.
- Alexey Oleinik looked okay, but I can’t help thinking that he’d perish under the smothering bulk of the Human Down Comforter (aka Cole Konrad).
August 2010 Women's Independent World MMA Rankings
The members of the voting panel for the Women's Independent World MMA Rankings are, in alphabetical order: Nicholas Bailey (MMA Ratings); Jim Genia (Full Contact Fighter and MMA Journalist Blog); Yael Grauer (MMA HQ); Jesse Holland (MMA Mania); Robert Joyner (Freelance); Zac Robinson (Sports by the Numbers MMA); Leland Roling (Bloody Elbow); Michael David Smith (AOL Fanhouse); Joshua Stein (MMA Opinion); and Ivan Trembow (Freelance).
Note: Gina Carano, Lena Ovchynnikova, and Emily Thompson are temporarily ineligible to be ranked, due to the fact that they have not fought in over 12 full months.
Note: Carina Damm has regained her eligibility to be ranked because she has fulfilled the terms of her 2008 California State Athletic Commission steroids suspension by paying her fine. Given that she has recent fights in both the bantamweight and flyweight divisions, she is eligible to be ranked in both of those weight classes.
August 2010 Women's Independent World MMA Rankings
Ballots collected on August 24, 2010
Featherweight Rankings (136 to 145 lbs.)
1. Cristiane "Cyborg" Santos (10-1)
2. Marloes Coenen (17-4)
3. Yuko "Hiroko" Yamanaka (9-1-1)
4. Cindy Dandois (4-0)
5. Shana Olsen (4-0)
6. Amanda Nunes (5-1)
7. Jamie Seaton (2-1)
8. Hitomi Akano (16-8)
9. Ediane Gomes (5-1)
10. Yoko Takahashi (14-11-3)
Bantamweight Rankings (126 to 135 lbs.)
1. Sarah Kaufman (12-0)
2. Roxanne Modafferi (15-6)
3. Tara LaRosa (18-2)
4. Miesha Tate (11-2)
5. Hitomi Akano (16-8)
6. Shayna Baszler (12-6)
7. Takayo Hashi (12-2)
8. Jennifer Tate (6-1)
9. Julie Kedzie (14-8)
10. Vanessa Porto (10-4)
Flyweight Rankings (116 to 125 lbs.)
1. Tara LaRosa (18-2)
2. Aisling Daly (9-0)
3. Rosi Sexton (10-2)
4. Zoila Frausto (8-1)
5. Rin Nakai (7-0)
6. Megumi Fujii (21-0)
7. Sally Krumdiack (8-3)
8. Monica Lovato (5-1)
9. Jeri Sitzes (3-1)
10. Carina Damm (15-4)
Junior Flyweight Rankings (106 to 115 lbs.)
1. Megumi Fujii (21-0)
2. Yuka Tsuji (22-2)
3. Lisa Ward (13-5)
4. Mei "V Hajime" Yamaguchi (6-2)
5. Jessica Aguilar (9-3)
6. Zoila Frausto (8-1)
7. Kyoko Takabayashi (11-4)
8. Jessica Pene (7-1)
9. Angela Magana (8-4)
10. Emi Fujino (8-4)
The Women's Independent World MMA Rankings are tabulated and published on a monthly basis, with fighters receiving ten points for a first-place vote, nine points for a second-place vote, and so on.
The rankings are based purely on the votes of the members of the voting panel, with nobody's vote counting more than anybody else's vote, and no computerized voting.
The voters are instructed to vote primarily based on fighters' actual accomplishments in the cage/ring (the quality of opposition that they've actually beaten), not based on a broad, subjective perception of which fighters would theoretically win hypothetical match-ups.
Inactivity: Fighters who have not fought in the past 12 months are not eligible to be ranked, and will regain their eligibility the next time they fight.
Disciplinary Suspensions: Fighters who are currently serving disciplinary suspensions, or who have been denied a license for drug test or disciplinary reasons, are not eligible to be ranked.
Changing Weight Classes: When a fighter announces that she is leaving one weight class in order to fight in another weight class, the fighter is not eligible to be ranked in the new weight class until her first fight in the new weight class has taken place.
Catch Weight Fights: When fights are contested at weights that are in between the limits of the various weight classes, they are considered to be in the higher weight class. The weight limits for each weight class are listed at the top of the rankings for each weight class.